What's This Word... REST?

Rest; a foreign concept and a distant memory of a simpler time. Before kids, before job titles, before marriage and the endless list of to-dos and want-tos. I watched my mom, my grandmother, and my great-grandma work long days and longer nights. Rest only happened in the cracks between survival and responsibility. Cat naps were treated like full restoration, even when the mind and spirit were begging for more.

As a woman, a wife, a stay-at-home mother, and an entrepreneur, I’ve often felt guilty for needing rest; as if exhaustion was my birthright and rest was a luxury I simply couldn’t afford. When you’re born into survival, who can blame us as Black women? We’ve been the last to be protected, the first to respond, and for far too many generations, the ones who had to make a way with our backs pressed against the wall. And now, here we are, trying to break generational curses of lack and overextension, while still learning how to slow down. Even now, in the midst of postpartum as I write, I have to remind myself to sit down, to turn off the noise, to exist without expectation.

When my husband and I began talking about legacy, rest wasn’t even a part of the conversation. But the more I grow, unlearn, and unfold, the clearer it becomes: rest is not optional. Rest is necessary. Rest is ours. And it comes in many forms; each one vital for us to thrive. So this is my reclamation of my right, our right, to simply be.

To tune into what our spirits have been longing for.

To honor what our bodies whisper for.

To listen as our hearts plead for release.

I’ve noticed the signs; the overwhelm, the overstimulation, the depletion and I’m learning how to restore myself before the crash arrives.

This is my offering to my Sistahs, because we deserve restoration, we deserve softness, and we deserve to be whole.

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THE 7 TYPES OF REST

A breakdown for Black women learning to reclaim restoration

1. Physical Rest

This is the rest our bodies beg for when we’ve been running nonstop. It’s deeper than sleep — it’s giving your muscles, joints, and energy systems permission to stop carrying everything.

How it shows up:

• Waking up tired

• Back, shoulder, or hip tension

• Feeling heavy or sluggish

• Snapping easily because your body is fatigued

• Feeling like your body is “buzzing” or wired

Culturally rooted truth:

Our mothers taught us to push through pain. Our bodies remember that. Now we learn softness.

2. Mental Rest

This is relief for the mind that won’t shut off — the overthinking, the planning, the survival-mode calculations.

How it shows up:

• Constant thoughts racing

• Forgetfulness

• Feeling mentally crowded

• Daydreaming or zoning out because you’re overstimulated

Culturally rooted truth:

Black women are often the “rememberers” — the ones who hold everything in their minds. Mental rest is releasing the load we silently carry.

3. Emotional Rest

This rest cleanses the heart. It lifts the weight of pretending you’re okay when you’re hurting or stretched thin.

How it shows up:

• Feeling like you’re carrying everyone else’s feelings

• Wanting to cry but holding it in

• Feeling emotionally flat

• Avoiding deep conversations because you have nothing left to give

Culturally rooted truth:

We are conditioned to be strong. Emotional rest allows us to be human.

4. Social Rest

This is the rest that comes from stepping away from the people who drain you or environments where you feel like you have to perform.

How it shows up:

• Feeling tired after social interactions

• Wanting to isolate, not from sadness but from overstimulation

• Being surrounded by people yet feeling unfulfilled

Culturally rooted truth:

Black women often code-switch, nurture, and hold space for others. Social rest is being around people where we can simply exist.

5. Creative Rest

This rest restores your inspiration, imagination, and ability to create from a place of joy rather than obligation.

How it shows up:

• Feeling stuck or uninspired

• Job, business, or hobby feels like a chore

• Forgetting what creativity used to feel like

Culturally rooted truth:

Creativity is ancestral — from braiding patterns to storytelling to music. When we lose access to it, we lose access to joy.

6. Sensory Rest

This is the rest that quiets the noise — visual, digital, emotional, and environmental.

How it shows up:

• Feeling overwhelmed by noise or clutter

• Needing silence

• Feeling irritated by small things

• Tension headaches

Culturally rooted truth:

Black women are often surrounded by noise — responsibilities, family, work, community. Sensory rest gives your nervous system a moment to breathe.

7. Spiritual Rest

This is the rest that reconnects you to meaning, grounding, and alignment — God, ancestors, intuition, or inner wisdom.

How it shows up:

• Feeling disconnected from self or purpose

• Feeling spiritually dry

• Going through the motions without meaning

• Losing joy in things that once grounded you

Culturally rooted truth:

Black women have always been guided by spirit. Spiritual rest brings us back home.

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DAILY REST INTEGRATION TIPS

Small ways to weave rest into everyday life

✨ 1. Micro-Moments of Stillness

Pause for 60–90 seconds between tasks:

• Close your eyes

• Drop your shoulders

• Take a deep breath

• Say, “I am safe enough to slow down.”

These micro-moments regulate your nervous system.

✨ 2. Five-Minute Body Check-In

Ask your body:

“What do you need right now?”

It will answer.

✨ 3. Create a “No” Boundary for Your Peace

One “no” a day = one act of rest.

No, not today.

No, I don’t have capacity.

No, I won’t overextend myself.

✨ 4. Limit One Energy Leak Daily

Choose one to reduce:

• Scrolling

• Background noise

• Overthinking

• Over-explaining

• People pleasing

Your energy is currency.

✨5. Practice a 10-Minute Spiritual Reset

This could be:

• Prayer

• Meditation

• Breathwork

• Sitting in silence

• Hand over heart

• Reading scripture or affirmation

Reconnect. Refill. Recenter.

✨ 6. Build a “Rest Ritual” Before Bed

Simple works best:

• Put your phone away

• Dim the lights

• Stretch for 2 minutes

• Speak gratitude out loud

Your body learns to expect calm.

✨ 7. Give Yourself Permission

Say out loud:

“I am allowed to rest.”

“I am worthy of restoration.”

“My strength is not measured by exhaustion.”

Let your spirit hear you.

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ABOUT LaVianca Asante’

LaVianca Asante’ is a writer, creative visionary, and feminine wellness advocate dedicated to helping women rediscover sacred rest, divine identity, and aligned living.

Through her storytelling, workshops, and sacred immersion experiences, she weaves together spirituality, healing, and artistry to remind women of their inherent power and wholeness.

Her work explores themes of faith, femininity, restoration, and creative freedom — calling readers into deeper connection with themselves and God Within.

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